Going with the flow 🌊

Going with the flow was a concept I didn’t understand for a long time.

I thought that the life I wanted to build had to be done through control and perfection. If I wanted something, hard work and, to be honest, forcing were required. I did not touch life with a light and graceful hand. I grabbed it instead. I followed up relentlessly, forcing solutions, making things happen when I wanted rather than when they were ripe and ready. In this way, I made life harder than it needed to be as I prioritized results over relationships.

I had to be older, make mistakes, get deeply hurt, find healing and look at the world through a gentler perspective to realize that not all days were not meant to be seized but can also be held softly and cherished. Perfection is not required to be worthy. And neither is force.

So I’m adapting what other women have intuitively understood and lived by: going with the flow. This doesn’t mean lounging around and doing nothing. It doesn’t mean saying yes to everything. Going with the flow starts with self-awareness and intention. It begins with an understanding about how I want to show up in the world and how I want to serve.

Going with the flow helps me appreciate the highs and not resist the lows. It helps me to understand that I need to show up but I cannot force things to ripen and bloom when they’re not ready. Nature helps me see this so clearly—the push and pull of the waves on the beach, the quiet and unseen growth from seed to plant to flower.

Going with the flow means trusting myself—trusting that I can say no to what doesn’t resonate (and that the world will not end if I do), that I am enough and that what is for me will not miss me.

Going with the flow means a nuanced acceptance. Acceptance is a difficult idea to grasp. It means that yes, things come up in your life that serves your growth. But it doesn’t mean saying yes to it all, at the expense of your health (physical, emotional, mental and relational). It also doesn’t mean saying no because of fear, when keeping yourself small is stopping you from stepping into the bigger life that’s waiting for you.

If you’re struggling with the flow of your life (i.e. your life is in chaos or you feel like you’ve taken an unwanted detour), don’t start with external effort. Flowing is not about forcing things to be what they’re not or passively accepting na “ganyan talaga” (especially when you know in your heart and gut that there is something you can do).

It starts inside.

If you’re ready to stop wrestling with life and struggling, if you’re ready to start understanding and accepting, my two courses are here for you. (Recently, I came across this term “affectionately made” and that’s exactly how I felt in creating these courses.)

Journaling for Wholeness is a four-week course to revitalize your writing practice. It also helps you get in touch with the parts of yourself that need love and understanding so you can access their wisdom and begin the process of healing. I’m also excited to share with you a variety of journaling practices, tips and prompts. The end result of this course: to discover the gifts of deep writing and rediscover the joys of journaling. (Yes, we will find things to write about despite the groundhog day feeling of this pandemic).

Journaling for Wholeness starts on 10.10.2021. Enrollment closes on October 9 and the next time I will offer this course will be in 2022.

SIGN UP HERE FOR JOURNALING FOR WHOLENESS

Craft a Life Vision is a course to help you understand who you are so you can show up in the world as your most authentic and powerful self. The end result: an awareness of your inner compass, your guiding light and a mindset statement that will guide your choices.

You can begin the course as soon as you sign up.

ENROLL NOW IN CRAFT A LIFE VISION

Here’s to trusting yourself and going with the flow this October.

Photo by Brett Meliti on Unsplash.