I’m writing this while my seven-year-old daughter is having a mini meltdown in her room.
Her teacher just told us that the kids will be doing a book swap on Friday. My daughter started to cry. She can’t stand the idea of giving away anything. She wants to keep baby clothes that no longer fit, books that haven’t been opened in years, plastic toys that have lost of most of their parts and whose stickers have peeled off—even if her room is overflowing with stuff.
I’m sure we can all have a giggle about her. Who wants to keep junky toys around? Doesn’t it feel better when we can empty our closets of clothes that only fit the almost-forgotten thin version of ourselves? Isn’t it great to be able to see the back of our shelves behind those stacks of dusty books?
As I look at her, I see that it’s easy to judge her behavior without realizing that I do the same thing. It’s not a problem for me to give away my old clothes. I can easily get rid of books I got bored with and stashed without finishing, gadgets that are no longer functional or cool.
But there are other things that are harder to let go. I have my ideas about productivity and my value (that I’m worth less because I’m not so busy). I have doubts about being self-employed (can I make my business a success?). My brain is filled fearful thoughts about money (can I live on less?). My identity is tied to what I do and how successful I am. And when I’m asked to release any of these ideas, I want to hold on to them, even if they’re junky, old and no longer fit my life.
I am gentle with my daughter, letting her see that by giving away a book, she will get another book back. I too need to give myself that same tenderness. I will allow myself to let go of these ideas. I will replace them with something better—more powerful and supportive thoughts about my value, abundance and the love for what I do and the amazing women who share their stories with me.
