Calm. One of my core desired feelings for the year.
I turned to a page in my life coaching notebook and saw these five words:
HAPPY.
FULFILLED.
CALM.
AFFLUENT.
SUCCESSFUL.
Unfortunately, I’m finding myself feeling anxious, annoyed and agitated. It’s only the first week of the New Year and already it seems like my core desired feelings have gone on vacation to a sunny beach somewhere and left me stranded in Manila.
If you’re feeling the same way, you might want to try some steps I take and questions I answer so I can move to where I want to be:
1. Lean into the icky feelings. Feel it in your body. Where is it coming up? What is it telling you? Feel the emotions completely instead of pushing it away.
“Hey, anxiety and agitation, what are you trying to tell me?”
2. Listen with kindness to the thoughts coming up. Acknowledge each one.
“I hear you’re anxious because you want to be a full-time life coach but you don’t know how to go about it yet. I understand.”
3. Think about what you can do differently to lead yourself back to your core desired feelings.
“I can find out what I’m supposed to learn in this situation. I can practice acceptance calmly instead of resisting how things are.”
4. Plan things you can do today or this week to bring back the core desired feelings into your life. Record it in your planner.
“I will update my blog because reaching out to my community makes me feel like I’m moving forward with my business.”
5. Be conscious about doing more activities that bring your core desired feelings to your day.
“I will make time for playing with my daughter and cuddling with her before bed. That will make feel happy, calm and fulfilled.”
It’s also good to journal this process—to ask yourself these questions and write down what comes up. Don’t edit yourself. Don’t overthink. Don’t judge.
Use this process when you’re feeling the complete opposite of how you want to feel—whether that’s stressed versus calm, timid versus confident, practical versus sensuous, alone versus supported.
If you’re still struggling and want to move beyond the being stuck in icky feelings, then check out my work with me page.
I would love to know: What are your core desired feelings?
