I have been practicing journal therapy since I was nine years old. Even if my childhood diary mostly contained me gushing about my celebrity crushes, I remember writing about my feelings whenever I was angry or upset. One time, I cried because a kid pulled out my hair. I can still recall the moment I sat down and filled three pages of my diary, venting my anger.
As a kid, you don’t really know much about expressing yourself when you’re high on emotions. However, keeping a diary has helped me do it and mindfully reflect when dealing with tough situations.
Journal therapy is just what it sounds like, it’s mental therapy through writing. You get a pen and paper, and then you write down the things that bother you. Journal therapy gives you a clear space for your emotions. It’s where you can be your fully authentic self without worrying if you’ve written too much bad language or if you have a grammatical errors.
However, as much as it is therapeutic, it doesn’t get rid of the problem. Instead, it processes your emotions by giving you a sense of control in managing your chaotic thoughts and lets you fish out exactly caused the distress.
Here are three simple steps to make journal therapy more effective:
Step 1: Swim in your own pool of sadness
Sit down in a quiet and relaxed space. If possible, be alone in the room.
Here, you may start writing, “Today, I feel __ because __”.
The first step of healing is accepting the pain and accepting that it has happened to you. You acknowledge your feeling and what it’s doing to you. Let yourself be vulnerable and just write it all out, throw yourself a pity party if you have to.
Avoid rereading or checking grammar and spelling errors because this distracts you from being truly honest. Just let go of anything that is holding you back and just swim in your own pool of sadness.
Step 2: Write to that person
Now that you’ve accepted pain and sadness, find another blank page for you to write about that person who made you feel that way. Write as if you’re going to actually send this letter to that person disregarding the consequences.
Write him/her exactly how you feel. Jot down the things you should have said or the words you have been keeping to yourself for so long. It doesn’t matter how long this letter is going to be. As mentioned earlier, just stay honest and vulnerable.
(Editor’s note: Give yourself some time and breathing space if you decide you want to send this letter to the person you’re writing to. Reread the letter. Edit if you must. What you’ve written in white heat may not be what you want to send in cold blood.)
Step 3: Write a letter to yourself
Acceptance is one of the several stages we go through in healing, and figuring out the root of it all is one thing. At this point, you’re still angry, sad or anxious. The next best thing to deal with the situation now is facing yourself.
On to the next page of your journal, write a letter to yourself in 2nd person. Instead of writing, “I feel…”, write along the lines of, “You must be feeling…”.
One of the greatest things about therapy journaling is that it lets you figure out the problems yourself by simply putting it into writing. You reflect and gain a deeper understanding of things you didn’t see before.
Try to write as if you’re talking to a friend, write down the words that you think are the best words to hear when someone is going through something that you are currently going through. Find the strength in you to be positive, that all this is temporary and it will pass. Give advice, be compassionate and be sympathetic.
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This is a guest post by the lovely Abigail Atienza of Revamped Copy. If you want to contribute to my website, send an email to lifecoach@auroramsuarez.com.
